Shoot To Thrill
by MicroSpider
Summary: Five months after Alice's vision at prom. Not much had changed. Nova and Emmett were still engaged, Bella still didn't want to have a birthday party and they all knew that someone was going to get Eris knocked up. SEQUEL TO SHOT DOWN IN FLAMES
1. Prolouge

***~*Prolouge*~***

* * *

**A.N. Hi! This is the sequel to Shot Down In Flames! If you're a new reader this story won't make sense without reading the first one, so I suggest you read that one before this one!**

**I'm really awful at prolouges, so I'm really sorry!**

**Thank You!**

**MicroSpider XD**

* * *

It had been just over five months since the prom.

The day after the prom Alice had explained to the rest of the Cullen's, November, Danny, Eris and Bella, what she'd seen.

Nobody was particularly surprised that Eris was going to get knocked up. With the amount of sex that girl had it was a wonder that she didn't permanently have a sore Vag.

Esme had asked why they couldn't just get married in the Summer anyway, why did it matter if Eris was pregnant or not when they got married?

But Alice knew that it was set in stone, unlike most of her other visions. This was for definite and that meant there had to be a good reason behind postponing November and Emmett's wedding.

So they didn't get married.

But Emmett moved into the cottage with November, Eris and Danny. Danny had all but told Emmett that he was going to be her father and then thrust adoption papers at him.

Changing Danny's full name to, Dannyele Dwyer-Cullen.

So the five months leading up to Bella's 18th Birthday had been weird, utterly confusing and everyone, but Bella, was happy to celebrate Bella's birthday. Mainly because it gave them something easy and simple to think about.

But they had no idea that it was Bella's Birthday that would set off a chain of events that would cause Eris' pregnancy, or the imminent departure of the Cullen's...


	2. Chapter 1

***~*One*~***

* * *

**A.N. Hi! So here's Bella's birthday! I remembered while I started writing that Nova had a power, so I decided to add the first bit and I couldn't be bothered with the school part that's meant to be at the start of the chapter, so I'm starting from here! XD**

**I'm not very well, again. Temperature, headache and a cold. So I'm listening to The Rolling Stones and writing, and that combination always makes me feel better!**

**Enjoy!**

**MicroSpider XD**

* * *

"Again," Emmy bear told me.

I'd been practicing for hours and it was becoming tedious.

A few weeks ago, we discovered that I could breath small breaths of fire on command. After that all of the Cullens' had taken time to help and encourage me into developing my power.

Which I had. Now could I not only breath large amounts of fire, but I could manipulate them to look like creatures, but that wasn't the coolest part.

If I concentrated enough, I could turn the fire animal into a real live creature. It was awesome and it explained how I managed to create Eris. But it did mean we had to chase down a couple Python and although they had no physical effect on us, they were still creepy as fuck.

_Then stop creating flame snakes and create flame bunnies!_

Snakes are easier, they're slick and don't have fur.

_So in other words. Less effort._

Exactly.

The only downside was that I couldn't wear cheep tongue bars, especially after I melted one onto my tongue. The taste foul foul.

I decided that I would indulge my fiancé and try to create a massive grizzly bear with fire.

I pictured a massive bear, huge claws, shaggy fur and a lot teeth.

Slowly exhaling, I rolled my tongue, blowing out bursts of fire. They swirled and slowly took form, solidifying as I blew the flames faster from my mouth.

I stopped and there in front of me was a massive bear, with huge claws, thick fur and bared teeth.

Emmett smirked at me, "You're getting better at this," he praised, licking his lips at the bear before pouncing on it's back to drain it dry.

I rolled my eyes, "Only because you keep asking me to create you bears, lions and once even a white rhino!"

That rhino caused a lot of problems.

_Why, because it created a huge whole in the wall and Esme was angry with Emmett because he was the one that suggested the rhino?_

No. It was really hard to hide the carcass, and it took a while for it to burn properly.

Em finished the bear, picked it up, sped off, then returned empty handed, "I didn't get any on me this time!" He cheered, noticing that he hadn't ruined his clothes for Bella's birthday.

"I pretty sure that if you'd ruined those pants, that shirt or the waistcoat, Alice would kill you," I told him, smiling when I realized just how tight the pants were on his ass. Dark colours really worked for him.

God I love my life!

_Because Emmett has a good ass?_

Yes.

_Amen to that sista!_

I had on my red and black Hell Bunny Avalon minidress, a pair of red New Rock boots style TR001, I had on simple silver bangles and studs and my hair was in two French braids.

He nodded in agreement, "Nobody wants to anger the Little Pixie," he moved closer to me, taking my cheek into his large palm, "I love you, babe."

I smiled, "I love you too Emmy bear," I lent up and kissed him deeply, wrapping my arms around his neck.

He stroked my tongue with his, grabbing the back of my head to apply more pressure into the kiss.

Suddenly there was a loud cough and a disgusted, "Seriously!"

I groaned, pulling away from the kiss to see Danny in a blue maxi dress, her nose wrinkling in displeasure. Next to her stood Eris in a simple orange cocktail dress, her eyebrow raised.

_Sucking face I see._

Yes bitch, you do see. Why did you interrupt?

Eris rolled her eyes, "The Birthday Babe has arrived," told us, "Oh and Rose is still pissed that Connor forced her to be here. So I'd be careful unless you don't want your head attached to your neck."

We quickly hurried into the huge white living room; just in time to greet Bells with a loud chorus of "Happy birthday, Bella!" while she blushed and looked down.

Alice, had covered every flat surface with pink candles and dozens of crystal bowls filled with hundreds of roses. There was a table with a white cloth draped over it next to Sir Broods-A-Lot's grand piano, holding a pink birthday cake, more roses, a stack of glass plates, and a small pile of silver-wrapped presents.

The distress was evident on her face and thoroughly amusing.

Carlisle and Esme were the closest to the door, waiting to grab the birthday girl into a hug. Esme hugged her carefully, then kissed her forehead, and then Carlisle put his arm around her shoulders.

"Sorry about this, Bella," he said in mock apology, "We couldn't rein Alice in. It didn't help November was encouraging her."

What can I say? I love watching Bella's eyes pop out of her head!

_I think most people do!_

Rosalie and Connor stood behind them. Rose didn't smile, but she didn't glare, so that was an improvement.

Connor's face was stretched into a huge pearly grin, his freckles emphasizing how white they were. They'd been in Africa for a few months together, checking out the 'forest cuisine', as the Irish strawberry-blonde liked to put it.

Connor had told me how he'd met Rose when his and his sister Siobhan's coven decided to visit Carlisle. He met Rose and apparently he'd decided that upon seeing her once, she was going to be his mate and Carlisle welcomed him to stay while his sister returned to Ireland. They formed their romance from that time onwards.

"You haven't changed in the slightest," Connor said with mock disappointment, "I expected at least one thing different, but here you are, red-faced just like always."

"Thanks a lot, Connor," Bella said, blushing deeper.

He laughed, "I must step out for a second," he paused to wink conspicuously at Alice, "Emmett my good man, would you possibly be able to leave your lovely lass and assist me in arranging my tools?"

Eris, Danny and my self all let out a synchronized snort of laughter, clamping our hands to our mouths.

_Well that didn't sound kinky at all!_

Oh god, mental image!

_I would like in on THAT action!_

Emmett smirked, "I would be more than happy to assist you, I noticed earlier that your tools were out and I was going to suggest you put them away."

We snorted even louder and Danny was giggling on the floor uncontrollably.

"Don't do anything funny while we're gone," Em told her, before kissing my head and disappearing off with Connor to install Bella's new radio.

"I'll try," Bella muttered weakly from embarrassment.

Alice let go of Jasper's hand and skipped forward, all her teeth sparkling in the bright light. Jasper smiled, too, but kept his distance. He leaned, long and blond, against the post at the foot of the stairs.

I knew it wasn't personal, just a precaution. I was doing the same thing.

Jasper had more trouble sticking to the Cullens' diet than the rest of us; the scent of human blood was much harder for him to resist than the others, he hadn't been trying as long.

I was hanging back because lately I'd realized just how good Bella smelt and I didn't trust myself being to close to her just yet.

_You have only be doing this for, what, five-six months? You're doing well!_

Thanks Eris.

"Time to open presents," Alice declared. She put her cool hand under Bell's elbow and towed her to the table with the cake and the shiny packages.

"Alice, I know I told you I didn't want anything ," Bella sighed.

"But I didn't listen," she interrupted, smugly, "Open it," she placed a large silver box in Bella's hands.

It was the empty box that represented the stereo that Rose, Connor and Jasper had gotten her; the one Emmett and Connor were currently installing.

She awkwardly tore off the paper then opened the box, only to discover it was empty, "Um... thanks."

Rosalie actually cracked a smile and Jasper laughed, "It's a stereo for your truck," he explained, "Connor and Emmett are installing it right now so that you can't return it."

_Smart people._

"Thanks, Jasper, Rosalie," Bella told them, grinning for some reason, "Thanks, Connor, Emmett!" She called more loudly.

The pair of them were laughing loud enough for Bella to hear and chuckle too.

Danny stepped forward, holding a long thin velvet box, "This is from Eris, Nova and myself," she told her.

Bella looked at me curiously, wondering why I wasn't giving it to her, so I flashed her my teeth. The sight of my slightly sharper teeth made her give a look of realization.

She flipped it open and smiled, "Thank you," she smiled at the three of us. It was a simple silver and topaz necklace. Simple, but expensive.

"Well I had some help with the colour, I heard from a Broody Sir that you were preferable to a certain shade of topaz," I told her cheekily, causing everyone to chuckle slightly, well everyone except Edward who was glaring at me.

Sorry Eddie!

_It's fine! He knows we call him Sir Broods-A-Lot!_

"Open mine and Edward's next," Alice said, so excited her voice was a high-pitched trill. She held a small, flat square in her hand.

Bella turned to give Edward a basilisk glare, "You promised."

Before he could answer, Connor and Emmett bounded through the door, "Just in time!"

Connor pushed in behind Jasper, who had also drifted closer than usual to get a good look, while Emmett wrapped an arm around my waist.

"I didn't spend a dime," Edward assured her, brushing hair from her face.

"Give it to me," Bella sighed, making, Emmett chuckled with delight.

She took the little package, rolling her eyes at Edward while she stuck her finger under the edge of the paper and jerked it under the tape, "Shoot," she muttered, a single drop of blood dripped from her finger.

_FUCK!_

"NO!" Edward roared.

My throat was on fire. I lurched forward before I could even comprehend what I was doing. Emmett caught me round the middle, tightening his arms as I fought.

Edward threw himself at Bella, flinging her back across the table. It fell, as she did, scattering the cake and the presents, the flowers and the plates. She landed in the mess of shattered crystal.

Causing more blood to ooze.

I clawed at Em's hands. Snarling like a feral cat.

Eris dragged a petrified Danny from the room.

_FUCK!_

Jasper slammed into Edward, and the sound was like the crash of boulders in a rock slide.

There was another noise, a grisly snarling that seemed to be coming from deep in Jasper's chest, not unlike mine. Jasper tried to shove past Edward, snapping his teeth just inches from Edward's face.

Connor grabbed Jasper from behind in the next second, locking him into his grip, but Jasper struggled on, his wild, empty eyes focused only on Bella.

"EMBER!" Emmett yelled, trying to snap me out of my violent haze, while dragging me from the room as Connor and Edward did the same to Jasper.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck-idy. FUCK!


	3. Chapter 2

***~*Two*~***

* * *

**A.N. Hello Earthlings! So, here's some sexy time! Shoot To Thrill is currently being told from the view of Nova, but when it gets to La Push scenes I will have to do them in Eris' view, seeing as Nova's a vampire and will get ripped to pieces if she sets foot on their land! **

**Oh and I'm not saying who's staying or going, but I can say that Nova might join Bella in Zombified depression and she's possibly going to end up getting in a fist fight with Sir Broods-A-Lot!**

**Enjoy the smut! ;P and remember that I have no experience in sexy stuff so this is based off my reading of M rated stories XD**

**MicroSpider XD**

* * *

It had taken me ten minutes to snap out of it. As well as about 14 destroyed trees, 3 Elk drained dry and a lot of hysterics.

"I can't believe I did that," I whispered to Em, my face buried in my hands.

I think I need a straight jacket.

_Not going to disagree with you._

Emmett lifted me off the floor and onto his lap, "One slip up, babe. And I had you. Nobody got seriously injured," he said, rubbing my cheek.

I lifted my head up, venom pooling in my eyes, "But what if you hadn't grabbed me? What if I'd ripped her throat out? What would I tell mom at her funeral? 'Oh hey mom, I'm sorry but Bella got a paper cut, so I decided to suck her dry. On her birthday, right in front of my daughter,'" I hissed sarcastically.

_Well aren't you optimistic._

Piss off Eris.

"That didn't happen though. We managed to restrain both Jazz and yourself in time and I'm sure Danny understands that it was just instinct," he told me, placing a kiss to my forehead, "Ask Eris how she's doing."

How's Danny?

_She's shaken, but she knows that it's only because Bella's got special blood and it was expected to happen much sooner. _

Good. Thanks.

_No problem she is my niece and as annoying as she can be, I guess I care about her._

I looked Emmy bear in the eyes, "Danny's fine."

He smiled, "Good to hear. Now, how about you say something ridiculous that for some reason turns me on and we have sex to make you feel better?"

I smirked at him, before pushing him onto his back and straddling him, "Cherries are red, nuts are round, skirts are up, panties are down, belly to belly, skin to skin, when it is stiff stick it in!" I chanted childishly.

_Oh you weird kinky bitch!_

Shut the fuck up Eris! Let the adults play! I don't interrupt your sexy time, so don't interrupt mine!

Em laughed loudly at my childish antics, rubbing his hand up my thighs until they met the sides on my thong.

He quirked an eyebrow at, "Skip the foreplay?" He asked, tearing the sides of my thong with his fingers. I could already feel that he was ready for me to ride his disco stick.

_Does he have a sparkly dick?_

Vampires are sparkly all over dear. Of course he has a sparkly dick. Now. PISS OFF!

"Impatient much?" I questioned, ripping off his shirt and waistcoat, then throwing it into a tree.

To my question he responded by thrusting up his hips and removing the remains of my thong at the same time, "Fuck..." I moaned loudly.

Em smirked, then watched as I lifted the dress off and over my head, "My point exactly, babe."

I'm so happy I decided against wearing a bra with this dress.

I rolled my eyes, "Smart ass..."

Suddenly we clashed lips, gripping each others hair desperately trying to get as close to each other as possible.

I lent myself down onto his chest pressing my bare chest to his, undoing his pants quickly and slipping them down along with his boxer, letting the beast forth from it's cage.

_Oh you twat..._

He grabbed my hips, holding me upright, brushing the head along my folds, "Fuck," I exclaimed, dropping myself down onto his length, filling me up completely.

"Holy hell, Ember," he muttered, watching me bounce up and down on his cock, kneading my breasts with his palms.

He thrust up his hips, burying himself as deep as he could, "Oh Emmy bear!" I moaned loudly.

"C-come on babe. I'm almost there!" He encouraged me as my speed hit inhuman.

Fuck I'm going to EXPLODE!

"SHIT!" We both yelled, causing the wildlife around us to leg it.

My vision became fuzzy, my body slack and my fanny happy.

I rolled off him and onto my discarded dress, "I'm feeling, much, much better," I told him breathlessly.

"Happy I could be of assistance," he whispered back hoarsely, "You ready to go again?" He asked.

I smiled, "We have a personal record to beat. I'm up for maybe, six more rounds."

"Really? I'm up for seven," he muttered sexily in my ear.

And suddenly so am I!

_Seriously? We have to listen to more of your moaning and screaming?_

Yes, yes you do.


	4. Chapter 3

***~*Three*~***

* * *

**A.N. Hi! I'm really sorry for not updating sooner, I've had exams and my brain lost all of it's creativity! But I've nearly finished all of my exams and I decided I'd try to write a filler chapter! This is from Eris' point of view and I've tried to make Sam, Paul and Jared seem in character but I'm sorry if they're OOC!**

**I couldn't remember which stories Jacob tells Bella in Twilight, so I'm just going to say he told her all of them! Sorry if you guys don't like it but I'm doing what I can to regain my mojo!**

**Enjoy!**

**MicroSpider XD**

* * *

**Eris POV**

"Y'know, I like pubes as much as the next female, but come on! If your balls are so hairy that they look like tiny poodles, you've got a problem mate!" I exclaimed, waving my hands around wildly as Danny laughed.

Just because up until around six months ago I was practically imaginary, doesn't mean I'm not a dick magnet. Unfortunately my last fuck, had the biggest hairiest balls I've ever seen!

_Thanks Eris, I really wanted to know that!_

You are very welcome my dear.

Danny and I had decided that we'd nick Nova's Apollo and come down to La Push seeing as she'd decided to scream down the forest. And we really didn't want to live through another six hours of THAT.

_We're done, you idiot._

Yeah right.

Danny rolled her eyes, "Can we, uh, not talk about hairy balls and poodles in the same conversation? I'm, never, going to be able to look at poodles, ever again!"

"At least I didn't say his balls were as saggy as a pug," I shrugged, making her her choke on oxygen.

"T-hat, i-s no-t a n-ice im-age!" She choked out, thumping herself on the chest.

I really did not, need to see my niece, in a bikini, smacking herself on the chest. It wasn't a nice sight.

She had on her black and white Banned Ribcage bikini and I had on my Khaki skull and crossbones string bikini. Meaning that we were both taking advantage of the mildly warm weather.

We were sat on the top of the cliff, waiting for the waves to calm down so we could dive off.

"I told you I could smell leech, Sam!" A male voice exclaimed behind us.

Danny and I smirked at each other simultaneously and rolled onto our fronts, both resting our chin in our hands.

The guy that had spoken, and was now sorta glaring at us was; tanned, maybe 5'11"-6" feet tall, with cropped black hair, dark brown eyes, and (from the giant bulge in his denim cutoffs) had a giant cock.

His eyes were like melted chocolate and I felt like I could push Danny over the cliff and not care as long as I got to stare in his eyes. I needed to say hi or fuck him against a tree until my lady cave hurt.

_Well that's not weird._

Of course it's fucking weird you twat! And I'm suddenly very happy that I'm in a bikini! Much easier to take off, fuck him, then put it back on and pretend nothing happened!

_And you tell me to stop fucking so much!_

Well you're a screamer and you go at it for hours. It sounds like a slasher movie mixed with a porno!

El Giaganto Cocko, had two accomplices; one was around 6'6", with an older face, tan, with yet again, black cropped hair and brown eyes. While the other was around the same height as Giaganto, tan, with brown eyes and cropped brown hair.

They each had a tattoo at the top of their right arm, all three of them were obviously Quileute, they were all buff as fuck and very, VERY, topless.

"Steroids?" Danny asked me, looking straight at the three men, who were stood there watching us. Not even bothering to pretend that they weren't.

I shook my head, "Na, not steroids. They shrivel your dick and this obviously isn't the case," I pointed out, "Werewolves, on the other hand. Very much so."

This caught their attention and they stared at us wide eyed, not speaking.

Danny's eyes popped, "Werewolves? As in the old Quileute Legends that Jacob told Bella, who told you and Mom and you told me?" She questioned, babbling on, "How'd you figure that?"

"They fit the description, plus, who else claims that they can smell 'leech'. Leeches suck blood and we smell like vampires because we live with one, so they're kinda tetchy," I shrugged, smirking as I said that we lived with a vampire.

The tallest one stepped forward, "There are vampires around here?" He asked, keeping his voice level.

I rolled my eyes, "Most guys would at least tell a lady their name before asking them to meet their sister."

"Sister? Your sister is a vampire?" Asked the guy with brown eyes.

"Technically, I was a voice in her head. Then she sucked off Emmett Cullen, who's mutant venom sperm turned her slowly into a vampire. But while she was turning, she found that she could breath fire," I started, letting Danny take over.

"So my adoptive Mom then starts hacking and coughing and Bad-a-bing bad-a-boom! Eris here's no longer a voice in Nova's head and she's lying stark naked on a hotel room bathroom floor," she paused for breath, "While all this was happening, Nova found out that she was Emmett's mate and she adopted me, her best friend and a whole bunch of other stuff happed. They decided that they'd have forest sex today and we thought we'd escape down here!" She concluded merrily, smiling at the three men.

"Does that mean the Cullen's have broken the treaty?" Brown eyes asked the tall one, who I assumed must be Sam.

El Giaganto Cocko sneered, "They killed someone, Jared. Of course they broke the treaty."

Even when threatening to my family he sounded so fuckable.

I rolled my eyes, huffed and stood up, giving them a full view of my half naked body, "Seriously? Haven't you listened to a thing we said?"

He glared at me, his eyes softening by the second, "They killed your sister! How are you okay with tha-"

"Seriously!" I cut him off, "The girl who's head I was stuck in, gave a blow job, to a vampire! Fuck, if she hadn't been turned and found her power, I'd still be fucking stuck in there!" I yelled, flailing my hands around, letting him watch my titts bounce.

_Thank you, Eris, because I really need that visual in my mind right fucking now!_

Alright keep your panties on!

_I'M GOING TO FUCKING RIP EDWARD'S THROAT OUT!_

What's going on?

_He wants us to leave._

Great.

I huffed, "The Cullen's don't even know that there are still werewolves in La Push. They thought the line died out a long time ago," I explained, "So if you want to have ago at anyone, have ago at November and her magical dick sucking powers."

Behind me Danny was pretending to gag, "Lovely way to put it Eris!"

Jared looked to Sam, "Does the treaty cover that sort of, uh, change?"

Sam seemed unsure, "I'm not sure, I'm going to need to visit the elders. We're going to need to meet the Cullen's-"

I interrupted, "That's not going to be a problem."

"Why the hell not?" El Giaganto Cocko demanded, his eyes doing their best to keep as much contact with mine as possible.

"You won't need to meet the Cullen's, because they're are leaving," I told them, "But they're leaving Bella, Danny, Nova and myself behind."

_NO THEY ARE BLOODY NOT!_

I'm sure Sir Broods-A-Lot would disagree.

_HOW DO YOU KNOW FUCKING EVERYTHING?_

Deduction, assumption and common sense.


	5. Chapter 4

***~*Four*~***

* * *

**A.N. I'M SO SO SO SO SORRY! This was possibly the hardest chapter I've ever had to write! So I remembered seeing a script for New Moon online and although I haven't seen any of the films I decided to use some of the dialogue for the New Moon flim. Once I finished the main scene I then realized that I didn't really understand any of what I had just written! So I wrote some short smut at the end!**

**Once again, I'm super duper bitchin' sorry! But then again I am the sort of age where I'm not totally focused on anything unless it's Alcide Herveaux from True Blood's abs! XP**

**Enjoy!**

**MicroSpider XD**

* * *

Everyone, minus Eris, Danny, Edward and Bella were sat around playing chess, being weird or talking in the Cullen's house. Eris and Danny were in La Push and Bella was at her house with Edward.

After Bella's birthday, Sir Broods-A-Lot was extra broody and even more uptight. According to Alice, Edward was still deciding whether or not we needed to leave. Except, he was forgetting that Bella was my sister, and that if I suddenly dropped off the map without any explanation, my Mom would bust a nut!

A metaphorical nut. She isn't secretly a dude. Well, as far as I know.

Not to mention that if Danny and I disappeared Maddy and Rosie would personally tear apart everything in their paths until they found us.

Emmy bear was playing Tekken 5 with me while I had my head rested in his lap. It was pretty easy to play without looking at the screen when you just randomly smash buttons and hope for a good outcome. Connor had started commentating about all the different moves we used.

Em had taken a liking to using the character King while I was best when using the big breasted Christie Monteiro.

Connor told me I was close to KO-ing King when Alice let out a cry, "NO! Edward has decided."

Suddenly the screen announced that Christie Monteiro was the wins.

I don't feel like a winner. We all knew what was going to happen. They were going to leave Danny, Eris, Bella and myself behind. It was obvious after all the visions that Alice had that this had to be the reason why we didn't get married. It was so Emmy bear didn't have to leave his family and I didn't have leave Bella and Charlie either.

I'M GOING TO FUCKING RIP EDWARD'S THROAT OUT!

_What's going on?_

He wants us to leave.

_Great._

I sat up and Esme gave us all a reassuring look, "Oh no. Poor Edward."

I could hear Eris telling Danny and someone else what was happening, through her thoughts.

There was no way they could leave, but I knew that Sir Fucking Broods-A-Lot would make them.

Daddy Vamp nodded, "We must respect his decision. Family members support each other," he said moving his chess piece as he played Jasper.

"Aren't families supposed to stay together too? Isn't Bella part of our family? She's Nova's sister and Danny's Aunt," Alice tried to argue, flicking her gaze to me.

"The situation has changed. We have to stay strong for Edward," Carlisle told the Little Pixie.

I buried my face into Emmy bear's chest as he stroked my hair soothingly. I could feel all of their eyes on me.

"So this is why in the visions Eris was pregnant?" Connor asked quietly in his soft Irish accent.

Esme got up quickly and sat beside Alice, "Can you still see Emmett and Nova's wedding?" she asked hopefully.

Alice sat stiffly for a few minutes as she delved into the future, before smiling and turning to Emmett and myself, "You're still getting married next Summer."

Emmy bear pulled me onto his lap and kissed my head, "We won't be gone long. We'll be back by next Summer."

I wrapped my arms around his neck but looked at Alice, "When are you leaving," I quietly questioned the pixie.

Alice frowned, "The day after tomorrow."

"If my calculations are correct. If you come back in the Summer, that could be anywhere between 9-10 months away," I told them then turned to Em, "Which means 9-10 of abstinence."

We possibly won't be able to have sex for 9-10 months. Yep, I said it. 9-10 months of no sex. I'm going to die from sex deprivation.

Eris was telling whoever she was talking to that the Cullen's were leaving without us.

NO THEY ARE BLOODY NOT!

_I'm sure Sir Broods-A-Lot would disagree._

HOW DO YOU KNOW FUCKING EVERYTHING?

_Deduction, assumption and common sense._

No sex for 9-10 fucking months!

Emmett realized what I was saying, "I. WILL. FUCKING. KILL. HIM!" he suddenly roared, grabbing me round the waist and running with me out the door as Esme's voice scolded him behind.

He ran us into the forest and faster than you can say bejebus, our clothes were off on the floor and I was being fucked against a tree.

"I AM GOING TO RIP HIS HEAD OFF!" Emmett yelled, pounding into me so furiously I was worried that I'd go through the tree I was gripping onto.

I tried to speak, but between being pounded into and moaning like a whore it sounded more like, "I-ugh-will...ohh...help. OH EMMY BEAR!"

My fingers gripped his hair and I rocked him forward onto his back, ridding him. His hands gripped my sides while mine rested on his shoulders. He sucked one of my nipples as I bounced up and down on his thick cock.

I could feel myself tighten around him until we were both screaming in ecstasy.

Our lips met feverishly, tongues intertwining, hands roaming each others bodies. I pulled my lips away slightly, "You're fun when you're angry."

He pecked my lips, "Only for you babe."


	6. Chapter 5

***~*Chapter Five*~***

* * *

**A.N. Sorry I've been gone so long, writer's block and tons of homework. Anyway, here's a new chapter, probably not the one y'all were waiting for but I'm still working on the Cullen's departure chapter. So I decided that instead I'd give you a look inside Eris' personality without Danny with her. **

**This chapter contains mild girl/girl just because I decided I wanted to show you that Eris really hasn't got many boundaries and that she's comfortable in who she is. I think this will be the only girl/girl chapter I write, but it will be mentioned in other chapters.**

**Thank you all for reading, reviewing and pressing the follow and/or the favourite button!**

**Enjoy!**

**MicroSpider XD**

* * *

**Eris POV**

My hair was a mess, my lipstick was smudged and our clothes were on the floor, but all that would come out of her mouth as I ate her out was a simple sentence...

"You do realize that my b-brother can hear us!" She cried loudly, gripping my hair tightly as I continued to plunge my tongue into her sweet dripping lady cave.

I grinned and pulled my face out from between her legs slightly so I could talk, "Maybe Seth shouldn't skip school then," I told her.

I could feel her walls clamp harder around my tongue as I plunged deeper, "You're ski-pping school t-too," she gasped out breathlessly, and smirk present on my face knowing that she was about to release.

That's because I knew it would be worth skipping.

Leah cried out loudly her juices exploded all over my tongue and dripped down my chin in her release...

* * *

Tomorrow the Cullen's were going to be leaving. Nova and Emmett were still fucking in the forest like a pair of horny rabbits and that's the way everyone wanted to keep them. Not to say that they liked hearing them fucking, but it was more because if they were doing that, then they couldn't rip Sir Broods-A-Lot's head off.

All I can say is thank god they aren't into BDSM. That would be fucking traumatizing to hear. Luckily being spanked or/and tied up isn't really Nova's thing.

_Why the hell would I want to be tied up?_

Bondage bitch!

_Fuck off!_

Oh go back to shagging.

_Gladly._

So while they were doing that I decided to skip school and head to La Push, this time without Danny because she actually liked school. Well, that and the fact that she'd have to hang around while I had a booty call with an old new friend.

But while I waited for my friend to get off her shift at work, I had time to kill. So I brought something to keep me company on the beaches of La Push, and that was called Cooking Mama.

I was making myself a virtual sandwich when I was interrupted by a big dark figure blocking my sun, "Hey there. Could you possibly step aside? I'm trying to chop cucumber here, and you're blocking my sun," I said, frantically tapping my stylus on the screen to chop it in time.

"Sure," a manly voice replied, stepping to the side, "Eris isn't it?"

I sighed, pausing the game while I looked up, "Yeah. You're Sam right?" I asked, seeing a face I recognized along with another, "And you must be his Alpha Female?"

The pretty woman smiled, "Hi, I'm Emily. It's lovely to meet you," she offered me her hand to pull me up.

Letting her pull me up, I brushed off my black tench coat, which hid my black spandex dress that covered literal nothing. I smiled down at her, only slightly taller than her in my black Pleaser stripper heels.

Yeah, the Cullens like to splash the cash.

_I noticed._

"It's nice to meet you too," I replied, shoving my DS into my Elvira coffin handbag.

One half of Emily's face was covered in long scars, but it didn't take away from the beauty, "What brings you down to La Push?" she asked with a smile.

I laughed, "My sister and her boyfriend have been going at it in the forest since yesterday because Broody Cullen says they have to leave, and I couldn't take anymore listening to trees shattering and loud orgasm noises," I complained, my words coming out quickly but not quick enough for them to merge.

Emily's eyes widened and she blushed a little before turning to Sam, "So that's what Jared and Paul have been hearing," she told him.

You hear that whore? You have an audience!

_FUCK OFF! And who are you calling a whore? You're the one with a booty call!_

Shut up!

Sam's eye twitched at the new information, "I better go and tell them it's nothing to worry about," he grumbled.

I shrugged, running a hand through my partially straightened corkscrew hair, "Don't worry, the Cullen's are leaving tomorrow, but they're coming back next Summer. Don't know when exactly they're going to be back, but that's the time Alice's vision of Nova's wedding was," I rambled on, rolling my eyes and not really making a lot of sense.

Sam looked at me strangely, "Vision?"

"Alice Cullen is psychic. Some vampires have special powers, my sister, for example has some special powers. She's staying here so it doesn't look suspicious, so you might want to talk to her after she finished her impending pity party," I told him.  
_  
I won't have a pity party!_

Yes you will, only difference is that yours will be eating mountain lions and not mountains of ice cream.

_Haha. Fuck off!_

Emily looked worried, "One of the Cullen's had a vision that they'll come back?"

They obviously weren't too pleased that the Cullen's were definitely not leaving permanently, "Of course they're going to come back. Emmett and Nova are getting married in the Summer and I'm giving birth in the Summer as well."

That caught their attention.

Emily's eyes widened in shock, "You're pregnant?" She gasped as Sam sniffed the air and frowned, "You don't smell pregnant."

"I don't?" I sighed in relief, "That's good to know because I downed an entire bottle of vodka last night and even I know that alcohol's bad for kids," I laughed, pretending to wipe sweat from my forehead in relief.

Emily nodded, "Children and alcohol aren't the best idea... Eris would you like to come back to ours? I've just made a big batch of blueberry muffins and I would love to get to know you more," She asked, her face so sweet and sincere, I wasn't going to shit all over her kindness.

I checked my watch and smiled, "Sure I've got about half an hour to kill, plus I could do with having a female friend that isn't my niece, a booty call, or a vampire."

"It's always good to have lots of friends," she agreed then looked at Sam, "Paul and Jared have been running for hours, shouldn't they, uh, take a break?" Her eyes were wide and she kept looking at me as if to make him realize something.

Sam's eyes widened, "Ohhh," he said before Emily's thumped him on the arm, "Oh oh yeah, they've been running for hours now I'm sure they could do with food, I'll go and get them!" He said abruptly running off into some trees.

Well that was subtle.

_Yeah, as subtle as a Emmy Bear's massive erection._

Because I really needed to know that.

"Men," she muttered as we started to walk, "Why did you say you were giving birth in the Summer?" She asked.

I swatted my hair away from my face, "Alice Cullen, she's psychic and she has these visions. Some of them are based on chance or on decisions, while others are set in stone things that will 100% happen. In one of her set in stone visions she saw my sister Nova's wedding, and I was heavily pregnant," I explained to her, trying not to over complicate it.

"This vision, it was next Summer?" She asked as we approached a little wood house, opening the door for me and we entered.

"Alice says Summer, but I guess it could just be a hot and sunny Spring day," I replied, shrugging.

The house was a typical home. Little mementoes and miscellaneous clutter everywhere, and it was homey, but not in the way you'd say to someone if you didn't like their house and were trying to be nice. It was honestly nice and it felt welcoming.

Emily nodded, taking in this new information while we went into the kitchen and she handed me a muffin, "Are you okay with that? Having a baby at such a young age?"

I laughed, picking the case off the edge of the muffin, "I don't know. I'm just going to go about life how I usually do and when I end up knocked up, I guess I'll just deal with it. I'm not deliberately getting knocked up though," I shrugged, I hadn't given much thought at what was going to happen.

Well, except for the fact that I'd planned that Carlisle would be the one to delve into my vagina and help pull the baby out of me.

_Wow that mental image._

Going to be fun huh.

Emily smiled sympathetically, "Are you going to plan who the father will be, or are you just going to, uh..." she trailed off not wanting to imply anything.

_She wants to know if you're going to be one of those chicks that isn't sure what colour or ethnicity their baby's going to come out._

Yeah I got that!

I shook my head, smiling widely as she fiddled with a radio, "I'm just going to wing it I guess. That might sound a bit, uh, what the right word?" I waited looking for the right word, "Iffy? Or stupid? I don't know, as long as my baby's healthy and doesn't look like a skinned rabbit, I'm fine."

Emily smiled, "I guess that's okay," she said whacking the radio until it sprung into Stevie Nicks.

_Oh Stevie we love you!_

I wish I could pull off shawl like ol' Stevie.

Emily started to sing along, putting plates down on the table, so of course I couldn't resist, and we ended up singing Rooms On Fire while dancing and twirling each other.

**\- just thinking that the rooms are all on fire  
Every time that you walk in the room  
Well there is magic all around you, if I do say so myself...  
I have known this much longer than I've known you**

**She had trusted many...**  
**And then there would be someone who would enter into her presence**  
**That she could sense for miles...**  
**She dreamed of her wanton luxury**  
**And she laughed and she cried... and she tried to taunt him**  
**And he hated to be separated...**  
**From that picture... No...**

**Well maybe I'm just thinking that the rooms are all on fire**  
**Every time that you walk in the room**  
**Ooh, well there is magic all around you, if I do say so myself...**  
**Well I have known this much longer than I've known you**

**Long nets of white cloud my memory...**  
**Long nets of white cloud my memory...**  
**Ooh... there is magic... all around you...**  
**Every time you walk in the room...**

**Well maybe I'm just thinking that the rooms are all on fire**  
**Every time that you walk in the room**  
**Well there is magic all around you, if I do say so myself...**  
**Well I have known this much longer than I've known you...**

**Well maybe I'm just thinking that the rooms are all on fire**  
**Every time that you walk in the room**  
**Well there is magic all around you, if I do say so myself...**  
**Well I have known this much longer than I've known you...**

We started giggling as the song ended, and we both fell into a countertop trying to catch our breath.

Suddenly a familiar voice cut through our giggles, "That was unexpected," he said.

I turned around to find El Giaganto Cocko (Whose real name must be Paul), Jared and Sam were stood staring at Emily and myself in all their cuff off jean glory.

I hopped up on top of the closet counter and grinned at the them, "Hello Boys," I drawled out, picking up another muffin and stuffing it in whole in a very unladylike fashion.

Jared snorted at the way I shoved the muffin in whole, "Wow, it's like you turned into a girl and learned how to sing."

El Giaganto Cocko glared at Jared and hit him forcefully in the shoulder before moving closer to me and picking up a muffin. His eyes were latched onto mine, as if he could stare into my soul.

_Creepy._

More like sexy. Unfortunately I didn't not wear underwear for him, so sexy times with this hunka spunk shall be postponed to maybe tomorrow.

Jared, Sam and Emily looked between each other and grinned suspiciously, "Y'all are keeping secrets and I want to know why it involves El Giaganto Cocko staring at me strangely," I told them with raised eyebrows.

Paul smirked at me, "El Giaganto Cocko?" He asked, his voice playful and his eyebrows twitching upwards.

I rolled my eyes at him, "I give everyone nicknames, just be lucky I didn't decide to call you The Angry One That Wants To Kill My Sister, but it was too long and the abbreviation wasn't very good," I sassed, clicking my tongue, "Now, tell me what it is you're keeping from me," I demanded from the other three.

El Giaganto Cocko was still smirking at me, but started talking to Sam, "Can I tell her? She already knows about werewolves and vampires," he asked his Alpha.

_Yeah, you definitely know about vampires._

Sam shook his head, "I don't think now would be the right time."

Paul flared his nostrils, taking in deep breaths, obviously trying to control his bubbling rage, "Then when is the right time?" He ground out, clenching his hands into fists.

_Hissy fit much?_

"I'm not sure. Maybe when the Cullen's leave," Sam told him.

Paul started to calm down at that, he knew the Cullen's would be gone soon, "Alright but if they aren't gone by next we-" she was cut off by the sound of my phone,

**She said "i'll throw myself away,  
They're just photos after all"  
I can't make you hang around.  
I can't wash you off my skin.**

It was Leah's ringtone and I quickly plucked my phone out of my bag and answered, "Hello you've called Pantie-less Prostitutes this is Eris speaking, on a scale of one to ten how horny are you?" I asked her grinning happily as Paul, Sam, Jared and Emily's jaws dropped.

_You dirty bitch._

Why thank you.

Leah laughed on the other end of the line, "Definitely ten," she told me, "Just finished my shift, you got the cuffs?" She asked slyly.

Did I have the cuffs?

I trapped the phone between my ear and shoulder and rummaged through my bag, nothing.

I sighed, "Forgot the cuffs," I muttered, "But I am wearing the dress you like and I'm going commando, so I think we'll be okay, " I said optimistically.

I liked Leah, I'd met her when I visited her Mom's clinic to see if I was pregnant a few months ago and I went back every other Tuesday to see if I'd ended up knocked up. That's how we met and became good friends.

She'd told me how she'd had a shitty experience with her ex-fiancé dumping her for her cousin, so I decided that I'd show her that you didn't need a man for a good time. So now we have booty calls every so often.

Leah laughed again, "Sound's good, how far away are you?" She questioned.

I thought about it for a few seconds, "Maybe ten minutes away?"

"I'll see you in ten then," she said and the call ended.

I hopped down off the counter and smiled at all of them, the three men who were shocked and Emily who was confused, "You know Leah?" Sam asked me, a hit of sadness and anger in his voice.

I laughed deeply, "Oh I definitely know Leah. I know her very well," they immediately got the hidden meaning, well everyone but Emily who was still confused.

I shook my head and ran a hand through my hair, "Anyways, I've got me a booty call so I must leave you sexy people," I paused for a second and went through my bag until I found my special pen then turned to El Giaganto Cocko, "Gimme your arm."

He frowned but gave me his arm hesitantly, "You have a booty call?" He slowly ground out as I wrote my number on his arm.

I peeked up at him through my lashes, "Jealous?" I asked him seductively, biting my lip.

He bent down so his mouth was to my ear, "Very," he whispered huskily, making me shiver and suddenly wish I'd worn some panties.

Emily looked to me and her eyebrows furrowed in confusion, "I thought you weren't deliberately trying to get pregnant?" She asked me slowly.

I chuckled a bit at how she'd missed the conversation, "You're right, but I'm sure that SHE'S not going to get me preggers," I chuckled a bit more before deciding that I really should get going,  
"Now I really must be going, I've got me a woman that really needs to be eaten out. So thank you for your hospitality you have a lovely home Emily and call me!" I yelled out as I walked through the house and out the front door.

_Wow, aren't you just a wonderful house guest?_

Fuck off.

It didn't take me long to reach the Clearwater residents and per usual I knocked on the back door for Leah, who almost immediately opened the door.

She grabbed me by the lapels of my jacket and kissed me forcefully, molding her lips to mine then quickly pulled away, grinning, "Seth's home so we're going to have to be quiet, " she whispered to me.

I smiled slyly, "I might have forgotten the cuffs, but I remembered the gag," I told her.

With that I was dragged quietly up the stairs and we spent the next 4 hours floating in and out of orgasm before I had to leave so neither Sue or Harry would find us in a compromising position.


	7. Chapter 6

***~*Chapter Six*~***

* * *

**A.N. Happy New Year! Bit late but here's the first chapter in 2015, it took a while because I wasn't sure how I should approach it. Here it is, after the long wait, the Cullen's leaving scene. I feel like it's a bit rushed, but I thought it's best just to get it over and done with so the story can continue and hopefully I'll update more often again.**

**I've now got a Polyvore account, so outfits are being upload. The link is on my Profile.**

**ENJOY!**

**MicroSpider**

* * *

Emmett had to leave.

I still didn't fully understand why he couldn't stay with me, or why I couldn't go with them, but apparently it would have been too suspicious if he'd stayed.  
Everyone knew that the Cullen's were close so they knew they wouldn't leave one of their own behind, and it would have been odd if I'd gone with them because in all honesty we hadn't known each other more the a fair few months. Plus I was going to have to try and pick up the pieces when Bella goes zombified.

After the aggressive forest sex a few days ago, Emmy bear and I had to be restrained from killing Sir Broods-A-Lot and I'd almost ripped Jasper's arms off because he was the unfortunate bastard that had to restrain me, but in the end we were chucked back into the forest to fuck away our anger.

So instead of killing Edward, yesterday we wallowed in the forest the entire day, fucking like wild animals and drinking blood like the wildlife was our own personal bar.

_I think Jared and Paul probably needed therapy after hearing that._

Oh yeah! How's El Giaganto Cocko?

_Still sexy. I ran Sam and his lady love Emily when I was on the beach. She's actually a really nice woman, we went back to theirs for muffins and now we're all friends! But you knew that as you're always in my head.  
_  
Eh I wasn't paying much attention. Isn't that sorta weird going into a stranger's house and eating their muffins?

_They were really nice. Once Sam told Emily who I was, she all but dragged me to their house. Plus it wasn't only Emily's muffins I was eating yesterday  
_  
Oh yeah, how's Leah?

_Very relaxed and probably quite tired still._

Emmett pulled me out of my telepathic conversation by pulling me into his arms and kissing my neck lovingly, "I love you so much my Sexy Monkey."

The Cullen's were finishing loading their things into their cars, Emmett had been loading his stuff into his Jeep earlier so that he could have a little more time to say bye.

I spun round in his arms and kissed him, venom pooling in my eyes, "I love you too Emmy bear. I'm going to miss you..."

He stroked my cheek with his thumb, "I'm going to miss you too babe."

_Shoot me now._

Connor snorted as he loaded up yet another box of Rosalie's shoes, "I think we all know how much you're going to miss each other. I think after all the noise you were making Danny's really going to need therapy and maybe some of those industrial ear muffs."

Out from the house came Danny who was carrying a bright pink suitcase and nodding in agreement, "Not nice, really really unpleasant," then she stopped and handed Esme the case, "Although sleeping in a room next to Eris is worse. Zoo noises at 2 am."

Eris poked her pigtailed head out of one of the windows a shit eating grin on her face, "What was that about my zoo noises?" She called down to us.

"Apparently they're getting louder!" I yelled back, "I'll call someone to soundproof it!" I told her making everyone laugh, everyone but Sir Broods-A-Lot, who was brooding a lot.

_He always broods a lot why should now be any different?  
_  
Maybe because he got what he wanted so he should be happy.

_Maybe he's brooding because he realized that he fucked up and now he's dragging everyone down with him._

Sir Broods-A-Lot decided to glare at me while loading up his twatty piano. He's not even that good anyway!

_Okay now you're being angry and hormonal, tone it down._

Eris quickly bound out of the house like a demented rabbit wearing what had to have been the most hideous pair of shorts I'd ever seen and stopped in front of Eddie boy, "So, Sir Broods-A-Lot, when are you going to break it to Bella?" She asked him, popping out a hip and folding her arms.

_My shorts are wonderful!_

If you're five or in the 80s maybe.

Sir Broods-A-Lot huffed, "Later."

What a dildo.

Eris rolled her eyes at his pathetic response, "Later as in before y'all leave, or later as in never? Because if you're going to ditch the girl you should at least say goodbye first," she reasoned, her face now held an expectant expression, as if telling him he needed to give her a reasonable response.

"Before we leave, I'm going to tell her before we leave," he muttered before storming off into the house.

Everyone was looking at Eris and she grinned happily at me, "See, now we know when we have to deal with a distraught teenage girl!" She chirped and then galloped off into the house again.

_Stop comparing me to animals!_

Stop acting like animals then!

Emmett turned me back around in his arms and quickly planted his lips on mine, arms winding around my waist while I hooked mine around his neck. I could taste his venom as our tongues intertwined, it was sweet but there was the burning aftertaste of our venom mingling together.

Behind us there was fake gagging noises that were probably Eris, Danny and Connor, "I think I'm going to puke," Danny muttered under her breath.

I _think I'm going to puke too._

Connor started laughing, "Stop the face suckin' you two, you've already corrupted the kid's inn'cence enough!" He called over to us in his slight Irish accent.

_He's not bloody wrong, from the example you've set Danny's going to end up pregnant by the time she hits 15!_

Yeah, like you can talk Miss Zoo Noises!

I tore my lips away from Emmy bear's and smiled at the red lipstick I'd left on him, "You've got something on your face," I told him, trying not to burst out laughing in his face.

Emmett grinned and shook his head, trying to wipe away the lipstick, "Thanks Babe, you make me feel so manly."

Esme rushed out of the house looking round at all of us, "Has anyone seen Edward? He isn't in the house," she asked us, her motherly face full of concern.

Great Eris, you made him run away.

_Me? The fuck you talking about? We had a friendly chat!  
_  
Carlisle came out of the house after her, "I think he's gone to talk to Bella," he said solemnly, "We've finished loading everything up," he told us, looking to Emmett and myself.

_Bejebus, if you get all girly and pathetic, I swear I will bitch slap you._

But they have to leave...

_Oh for fucks sakes! You knew they had to leave! It's not like it's permanent, just for a couple of months until shit happens and they come back!_

I paused for a second considering what she'd said, and to be honest she did have a point.

_Of course I do! Now, say goodbye to everyone and I'll distract Danny while you get all kissy with Mr Drool-worthy. _

I nodded and smiled at Eris, who grinned back before diving into Connor for a hug.

You are such a short ass.

_No, you're all just giants._

Alice was the first person to come skipping up to me, with Jasper behind her, "We're going to miss you Nova, but we'll see you soon, I promise," she told me, gripping me in a tight hug.

As soon as she released me Jazz Pants gave me an unexpected hug, it was brief and awkward but he meant well, "I'm going to miss you both too. The Little Pixie and Jazz Pants..." I trailed off.

Alice smiled at me softly then took Jazz's hand and they went to say bye to Eris and Danny, switching place with Rose and Connor.

Connor grabbed me out of Emmett's hold and then squeezed the life out of me, "I'm going to miss you kid, and your weird hair," he told me, bopping the bun on top of my head, "Who 'm I goin' t' laugh at now?" His Irish accent was suddenly laid on quite thickly.

I patted him awkwardly on the back, unable to hug him back as he'd trapped my arms to my sides, "I'm going to miss you too Ginger."

Connor dropped me suddenly, "I'm not feckin' GINGER!" he complained, pouting like a child, and Rose patted him on the arm, while Emmett chuckled behind me.

I smirked at him, "You are feckin' Ginger so deal with it ginge-y!" I teased him, then flicked my tongue out at him childishly, popping out the Hello Kitty tongue bar.

Rose stretched up on her tiptoes and kissed her frustrated mate on the cheek, "It's alright, I like my men ginger," she whispered in his ear and then bit on his earlobe.

Danny started groaning and clamped her hands over her ears as Eris covered up her eyes for her, "PG! KEEP IT PG!" she yelled, shaking her head frantically.

Rose smirked and dragged her mate off to her shiny red car.

_I wonder if vampires can have car sex?_

If they wanted to absolutely kill the car they can.

Esme and Carlisle came over to us next and Esme grasped me into a motherly hug, "Take care of yourself, and make sure that Eris takes care of herself when she's pregnant. I bought her some books, but she's going to be fragile and you're going to need to look after her as well as Bella," she told me in her soft caring way that made me miss Mom.

I smiled, releasing Esme form the hug, "Don't worry, I'll keep her away from caffeine and soft cheese," I laughed, that girl is going to be so pissy without coffee.

_Maybe I should name the kid Satan._

Just because you can't drink coffee because of it?

_You're acting like I'm already knocked up! Which I know I'm not because the last person I fucked was Leah, and Sam told me I wasn't pregnant before that so I'm still doing good!_

Carlisle then gave me a quick hug and handed me a thick envelope, "Put this in a safe place and don't open it unless there's an emergency, don't tell Bella, Eris or Danny that you have it," he said and then pressed a kiss to my forehead before he and Esme whizzed off into their vehicle.

Then it was just Eris, Danny, Emmett and myself, and all I wanted to do was cry. I've never been that pathetic girl that cries over a guy, but Em wasn't just a guy, he's my mate.

_I swear I will RKO you._

What's that I hear? SWEET CHIN MUSIC!

_We would be an awesome Diva's tag team._

Because we're both mentally unstable and would be able to telepathically tell each other what to do?

_I was thinking more along the lines of we're sexy, but I guess yours works too._

Emmett wrapped his arms around me and buried his face into my shoulder, "Edward's a dick for make us leave," he mumbled childishly and nuzzled into me.

Danny and Eris made their way over to the two of us, Emmett peeled himself off of me and Danny launched herself onto him and burst into tears, "It's okay Munchkin, we'll be back before you know it," Emmy bear whispered to our crying daughter while she clung to him.

_Would it be insensitive to take a picture right now? They just look so cute._

Very insensitive, but I agree. They do look cute.

The crying teenage girl released my massive man and wiped away her tears, "I'm going to find a new game I can kick your ass at for when you come back," she sniffled with a grin.

Emmett let out a echoing laugh, "I'll look forward to it Munchkin," he said before turning to Eris, "Don't get into too much trouble."

Eris smirked and twirled one of her pigtails, "Don't get your hopes up Em," she chuckled and then looked up at the sky, "DANNY THAT CLOUD LOOKS LIKE A MASSIVE COCK!" she yelled dragging Danny away from us.

_Make it quick, you're on the clock._

I twisted round and hopped up onto Emmett, kissing him desperately like a my life depended on it. Em wrapped his arms around my waist as mine wound around his neck. He pulled me in as close as possible and our tongues tangled together.

It's not a secret that I've kissed and fucked lots of people, but none of them had ever made me feel the way Emmy bear did, like the luckiest woman in the world.

Em brought up one of his large paws to stroke my face and I started to sob. I guess it's lucky I can't cry, my makeup would be ruined and it's would have migrated to his face. Plus I was never exactly a pretty crier.

It had once been described as a squealing pig being bludgeoned. Not a nice mental image.

_3\. 2. 1._

"Jesus they're kissing again," Danny complained, telling us that that was our cue to stop.

I slowly tore myself off Emmy bear, my entire body shaking with my tearless sobs, "I love you Emmy bear," I whispered to his and buried my face into his large chest.

Em pressed a soft kiss to the top of my head, "I love you too Ember," he whispered back, before releasing me and suddenly there was a loud crack as a nearby tree splintered.

_I think he's just a bit angry still._

FUCK OFF!

The door to Emmett's Jeep slammed shut and all of the cars started up, then before we knew it they were off down the drive and we were left alone.

Danny move over to give me a hug, but I shook my head. I was too emotional, and therefore dangerous.

I tore my hair out of it's bun and shook it out, "I'm going to Canada, I'll b-be back by the end of the wee-k," my voice broke, and I quickly sprinted into the trees, not caring about the two of them calling after me.

_I'll keep her out of trouble.  
_  
Danny or Bella?

_Both of them, you've just left two very emotional teenage girls behind. They're going to be pissed when you come back.  
_  
I've got my own shit to deal with.


	8. Chapter 7

***~*Chapter Seven*~***

* * *

**A.N. I know, I suck at updating and all of my stuff deleted off my tablet so I had to re download everything and try and remember my passwords for things, but whatever yesterday I drank a ton of coffee and watched 4 hours of WWE and decided to write a new chapter. Check out my Polyvore, link's on my profile.**

**ENJOY!**

**MicroSpider**

* * *

**Eris POV**

I threw my head back onto my pillow, jolting my hips back into Paul's face, "Shit Paul, your tongue feels like fucking velvet..." I told the man whose face was currently between my legs, with a pleased smirk.

After the Cullen's left and Nova fled like a hysterical gazelle to Canada, yeah I know, why the fuck would anyone in their right mind choose Canada over Disneyland? Oh that's right she's feeling a bit sad and her brain's totally fucked, and she's barely responding to me.

Back to the point now. Danny was all sad and when we got home she decided to lock herself in the closet beneath the stairs with a jumbo pack of double stuffed Oreos (smart girl), and I had a text from Paul, AKA El Giaganto Cocko, who'd been smart enough to transfer my number off of his arm and into his phone.

Since Danny was being a greedy Harry Potter, I decided to text Paul my address and a time then waited to see if he'd come knocking. Oh he came knocking, and he bought vodka.

_Good for you._

Shut up you deserter, I should shoot you for going MIA on me and leaving me to deal with YOUR daughter.

_Fuck you, I'm not bringing you any Canadian bacon._

At least I can eat Canadian bacon.

Silence... Yeah I win. So we drank the vodka, got to know each other, and I didn't tell him about the Cullen's even though I knew it would make him and his little wolfy friends happy, but we we're too busy sucking face for me to be able to.

Paul ran his hands up and down my thighs, stroking them as his tongue flicked my clit; this guy had experience and not the bad kind. I ran my hands through his thick silky hair, massaging his scalp and making him moan against me.

Well that was a good idea.

_Whore._

Look who's talking! All hail the Queen of Skankdom!

_I'm engaged!  
_  
Doesn't make you any less of a whore.

_Get back to your dog._

Paul started sucking and nibbling on my inner thigh when I could hear the vague noise of the home phone going off in the distance, Danny must have picked it up because it stopped not long after it started.

Suddenly there was a loud knock on the door, three sharp whacks to the cherry red painted wood, "Uh, Eris?" Danny called out awkwardly, she'd obviously noticed the g-string on the door handle.

I sighed and Paul sat up with a slight scowl on his face, before pulling my naked form into his similarly naked form and wrapping his arms around my waist as he buried his face into my titts.

"Yeah Danny, did you eat all the Oreos? If you ate all the Oreos I will deck you," I yelled at the teenage girl through the door, causing Paul to smirk into my chest as he licked one of my nipples.

There was some muttering from the little Goth girl, "Uh, actually Bella's Dad is on the phone, Chief Swan needs to talk to you..." She said, then opened the door and lobbed the phone into the room so she could slam the door shut again, "Sorry!"

The man hates me, what the hell does he want?

_Answer the phone and find out._

So, when Danny threw the phone I don't think she meant for it to hit Paul in the back of the head...but either way, he was growling into my boobs and shaking in a way that was reminiscent of a vibrator with almost dead batteries.

I stroked the back off his head and that seemed to calm the guy down, so I picked up the now mildly cracked phone and placed it to my ear, "Hello you've called Pantie-less Prostitutes, this is Eris speaking, on a scale of one to t-"

"Cut the crap Eris, I don't have time for your childish games, Bella's missing and I can't reach Nova," Charlie growled into the phone, the man seemed to be conflicted between worry and wanting to seeth because he had to talk to me.

Maybe Sir Broods-A-Lot finally ate her.

_I hate that twat._

I'm sure he loves you too.

Rolling my eyes, I flopped back into my bed while Paul shot up off the bed and flicked through my closet, tossing articles of clothing at me before scavenging for his own,  
"Nova's in Canada, something about wanting to star in a few more pornos before she gets married, which won't be for a while seeing as the Cullen's have jumped ship and fucked off to fuck knows where. I think Eddie took Bella on a delightful walk up the path," I rambled, trapping the phone between my ear and my shoulder as I shimmied into my underwear and skinny jeans.

Paul, who was now unfortunately fully dressed, stared at me when I mentioned the Cullen's and kissed me hurriedly on the lips and made them tingle before diving out of my window; probably to fetch Sam and Jared seeing as he let out a loud howl.

That was so cute and fuck I should have bitten that ass and ignored Danny so we could have moved past foreplay...

_I think Bella is more important than you fucking Paul._

I think Bella is more important than you buying Canadian bacon that you can't even eat!

Charlie was muttering on the other end to some dude, sounded like Deputy Johnston (friendly, doesn't recognise fake IDs, average size penis), "Eris, meet me at the path and bring anyone else who's familiar with the woods, we're putting together a search party," he told me, his voice strained and he was obviously feeling quite stressed.

"Sure, and I'll remember to put some clothes on before I grab my sexy male friends."

"Eris..." Charlie hissed at me under his breath.

I smirked to myself as I slipped on my boots, "Paul Lahote, Sam Uley, Jared Cameron, guys from The Rez and they're like sniffer dogs but better, just ask Billy I know he has to be lingering around somewhere," I told him snappishly,  
"We'll be there soon, don't wait up. Just remember, hysterical teenage girl, shitty breakup, probably traumatised."


	9. Chapter 8

***~*Chapter Eight*~***

* * *

**A.N. Hi so there's two povs in this one! Whoooh! Fun times, I was a tad tipsy while writing this.**

**Have fun XD**

**Microspider**

* * *

**Nova POV**

Screw her I'm not buying her any Canadian bacon, fucking whore. Eris was being a little bitch and little bitches don't get bacon, no kind of bitch gets bacon. Not fucking buying her any.

Who needs bacon anyway! 7 moose and a strange duck thing, that was my dinner! Who needs fucking bacon? I don't... Okay yes I do, bacon is my go to sadness food and I need a fuck ton of it right now.

_Just go for some pig's blood, mmmm nutritious...  
_  
I'm going to punch you in the fucking vagina.

_Good luck with that, it's going to take a while for you to get back from Canada to do so._

Oh fuck off! Go find Bella with your stinking dog boyfriend!

_Well at least my 'stinking dog boyfriend' is actually reachable, unlike your bloodsucking pasty pebble.  
_  
I kicked a tree. Or I launched myself at a tree and cracked it clean in half so that it fell over onto a squirrel. Usually I'd feel bad for some shit like that but to be honest I really don't give two fucks, probably just saved it from being roadkill.

Anyway, I'm not in Canada to feel bad for squirrels or to hold myself a pitty party. No, I have an ulterior motive, it's something Jasper had been helping me look into with the assistance of his 'friend', J Jenks. Jazz Pants seemed to scare the lawyer shitless and was very quick to persuade in helping us with our quest to seek out my origins.

After a few months and quite a lot of digging into hospital records and other legal things that I wasn't very familiar with, we found a few names, but there was only one that I had been searching for.

Harriett Stradlin.

* * *

**Eris POV**

I tried. Honestly, I tried so hard. So fucking hard. It was untameable and I seriously wanted to shave it all off. My 'sex' hair was wild and I wasn't even able to shove a hat on that shit, so I ended up putting it into two puffy ponytails.

_Wow, that was so interesting._

I know! My everyday struggles, how do I cope?

_Sex, and lots of it._

Hahahaha, you're going to be so not screwed on that front for a while.

_Fuck off!_

After I finished sorting myself out, I found Danny sat next to the front door with Oreo crumbs all down her front and brown smears around her mouth, her eyes we're wide and one was twitching due to sugar rush.

She flicked her gaze up at me, reminding me off the squirrel from Ice Age, "What? Where are you going? Where's the sexy man?" She rambled, staring at me with her mildly crazed eyes.

The doorbell went before I could answer her. I flung open the door and smirked, "I think I found the sexy man," I told Danny, grabbing one of her chocolate covered hands and yanking her up from the floor; bad mistake on my part because she decided to just stare at Paul with her twitchy eye.

Paul raised his eyebrow when he saw Danny and looked at me for an explanation, "Sugar rush," I said simply before grabbing Danny's sneakers and lifting her over my shoulder, causing her to squeal in shock, "Shut the door for me would you?"

He let out a small chuckle before closing the door and leading the pair of us to a deep blue truck that contained Sam and Jared; wow, they got here fast, or maybe I took too long on my hair...

Jared opened the door from the passenger side, a large grin on his face, "Hey Eris," he wiggled his eyebrows at me mock suggestively, "Have fun earlier?" He asked me, only to receive a deep growl from Paul who took Danny from me and passed her to Jared who buckled her in between Sam and himself in the cab.

"It would have been more fun if my maker's adoptive sister didn't get lost in the fucking woods, but sure, it was fun," I replied to the disgustingly chirpy werewolf, while I climbed into the bed of the truck with the assistance of Paul.

Actually Paul's just squeezing my ass while I try to pull myself into the bed.

_Ain't he a peach.  
_  
Ima bite his ass like a peach.

"Paul..." Sam warned his pack mate, making Paul huff and hoist me into the bed of the truck with ease before jumping into it himself.

I shoved Danny's shoes through the divider, accidentally getting her in the back of the head, "That wasn't friendly!" She complained, rubbing her head with one hand and putting a shoe on with the other.

Paul pulled me into his lap and tightly secured his arms around me, making sure that I was going to be safe and not rolling around in the bed while Danny had the luxury of a seat belt and being sandwiched between two large warm men.

_Quit your bitching!  
_  
Quit your ditching!

Sam was grumbling under his breath, obviously not pleased with the current situation but was just taking everything with a pinch of salt, "Okay, let's find Bella," he said conclusively, turning on the truck and rolling away from the little home.


End file.
